We Have a Problem Here!

I’ve never understood this.  In fact, I didn’t know it was common until I finally noticed it.  My wife will call me and as soon as I answer the phone, I hear, “We have a problem”.  I’ve been married for years and I’ve been a homeowner, car owner and more for about as long.  When someone says, “We have a problem”, my mind begins to spin to try to anticipate what I’m about to be hit with.  

This just happened yesterday.  My wife called and after announcing, “We have a problem”, I found out the “problem” was that there is a SLIGHT drip coming from one of the pipe joints above where the plumber swapped out our pump filter.  When I say it is a slight leak, I’m not kidding.  I timed it.  ONE drop every 20 seconds or so.  At that rate, the bucket under it will eventually fill up … in about 7 decades.  The same plumber is dropping in tomorrow to fix it.  No “problem”.

I’ve actually, verbally, specifically asked my wife to NOT start a call with “We have a problem” but I guess we’re still breaking an old habit.  Another thing that happens at our house that is probably common in most homes is having your name inserted right after a catastrophe.  I know this has happened to every guy.  You’ll hear, “Oh $***”  and then (Insert Husbands Name HERE).   I can fix almost anything.  I can help clean up disasters, fix drywall, work on cars, etc.  So, it’s OK to just come and tell me what you need.  But I cringe when I hear my name after a crash or after just a random expletive.  I’m not to the point of running to hide like the family dog but still don’t understand the sequence of events.  

Ladies, if you do this, please do your husband or boyfriend a favor.  Tell him what you need without the big setup of “We have a problem”.    And when a disaster happens that is expletive worthy, give it a minute so he doesn’t start to dread what’s coming next after his name.